Multiple books, programs, and laws have been recently published, initiated, and passed to encourage modern evangelical Christians to adopt a “biblical” dating strategy. From I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris in the early 2000s to the many rules Christians have about dating today, there are a lot of supposedly biblical views on dating.
There are a lot of tips and strategies for Christian dating, and many Christians don’t know what the Bible says about it.
Concerning romantic relationships, the Bible is silent. The only love connections that any biblical figures had were arranged marriages and betrothals. Biblical times and modern times both lack the practice of dating.
Nevertheless, a few general principles, such as maintaining a proper perspective in dating and emphasizing purity in romantic relationships, may be gleaned from the Bible.
Maintaining a Healthy Perspective in Relationships
“Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” Hebrews 13:4
In everything, a Christian’s top priority should be the Lord (Matthew 6:33; Luke 10:27). A new romantic interest might cause a person to become completely enamored with them. People frequently put their long-term relationships on hold for their current romantic interests.
- A Christian’s devotion to God might suffer if they focused inordinately on romantic pursuits. Marshall Segel’s article, “The First Step in Dating Is Faith in Our Lord, Savior, and Greatest Treasure, King Jesus.”
- Every Christian should be deliberate in their walk with the Lord, seeking to bring Him glory in every aspect of their life; similarly, Christians should ensure that the person they are dating is wholly devoted to the Lord. Christians shouldn’t date people who don’t believe in God because every dating relationship can lead to marriage (2 Corinthians 6:14-15).
- Even while dating another Christian, one must be conscious of the other’s spiritual walk. Does their faith in Christ become stronger over time? Is it their ultimate goal to prioritize their love for him above all other pursuits, including romantic relationships and marriage? Christians should consider the other person’s spiritual health before becoming too close.
- Regarding dating, Christians should not let themselves become desperate and lose sight of the big picture. As a result of the Western church’s (and especially the American church’s) emphasis on marriage, unmarried Christians often feel pressured to settle down and have a family.
As a result of social pressure, many unmarried Christians settle for an affair with a married person only to satisfy their sexual needs. In contrast to this way of thinking, the Bible tells people to pray about whether they should get married or stay single and not just base their decision on what other people think (1 Corinthians 7:35).
Even if they are free to pursue romantic relationships with the hope of finding a life partner, these Christians may end up spending most of their lives on their own. While being single is not a lesser status, it does have certain benefits while serving the Lord (1 Corinthians 7:32, 34).
As opposed to squandering their time as single individuals, Christians should pray and be open to God’s direction about when, who, and if they should be dating.
The Necessity of Purity
“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.” Romans 12:1
Although the Bible doesn’t guide how Christians should go about dating, it does address the importance of maintaining purity in romantic partnerships (1 Corinthians 6:13). There is no sense of innocence in the global system that promotes sexual immorality.
Many people, including some Christians and atheists, date, live with, and eventually pick a new life partner. Christians who want to honor God with their lives shouldn’t succumb to the temptation to live with a significant other before they get married. Instead, they should stay single until they get married.
Teenagers and young adults are more likely to have sexual relations outside of marriage because so many messages in the media make people want to.
But the Bible says to avoid this: “Run from anything that arouses youthful lusts. Instead, you should strive to be a person of righteousness, loyalty, love, and peace. Have fun in the presence of those who seek God via prayer (2 Timothy 2:22, NLT). Sexual activity is prohibited outside marriage (Matthew 19:4-6; Hebrews 13:4).
As a result, Christians currently single should avoid all forms of sin (1 Corinthians 6:18). Having godly family and friends to answer to might be a good safeguard against sinning against the one you’re seeing.
In addition, there are situations in which it makes sense to ask friends out on double dates. To be pure, a believer must be able to control their emotions and see when they are being tempted.
Suppose a Christian feels tempted on a date. In that case, they should pray and try to leave the situation (1 Corinthians 10:13). Keeping the Lord’s commandments on sexual purity is important for Christians of both sexes (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).
Christian courtship although many suggested dating tactics and rules within Christian groups, the Bible does not address how a Christian should approach dating. But Christians should have a different view of dating than the rest of the world, which encourages sexual immorality and bad behavior.
When looking for a companion or girlfriend with the intention of marriage, Christians should prioritize God in their lives and strive to please Him in everything they do, including dating.
Keep your focus on your love for God, the source of all happiness and love, and you’ll be better able to place your romantic relationships in the proper context.