The Bible clarifies how important it is for married couples to maintain sexual purity. God designed sexual intimacy between a man and a woman to be a source of joy and satisfaction within the marriage covenant (Ephesians 5:31). Humans have discovered the benefits of this divine gift well beyond marriage and have used it in practically every circumstance. The “if it feels good, do it” mentality prevalent in the secular world has contributed to the decline of Western culture’s emphasis on sexual purity.
However, think about what the Bible says about sexual morality. God does not need us to act unholy but rather holy. “That you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you learns to control your own body in a pure and dignified manner, rather than in great desire like the heathen who do not know God” (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, 7). This scripture explains why it’s important to God that His children practice sexual virginity.
First, because we are “sanctified,” we must avoid all forms of sexual immorality. “purified, rendered holy, consecrated [to God],” “sanctified” also has the connotation of holiness. Because Christians have been rendered holy by substituting Christ’s righteousness for their sin on the cross and because they are brand new creations in Christ, they are obligated to conduct themselves in a holy manner (2 Corinthians 5:17–21). Everything about our old selves, including our sexual and other sins, has been buried. We now have to rely on the one who died for us (Galatians 2:20). To deny this is to commit the sexual sin of fornication, and to commit this sin makes us question whether or not we have ever been genuinely born again. Our sanctification, or becoming more like Christ, is a key sign that our salvation is real.
Understanding the value of self-discipline is emphasized in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5. Because self-control is a fruit of the Spirit, engaging in sexual immorality is evidence that the Holy Spirit is not dwelling inside us. We all display the Spirit’s fruit to varying degrees, depending on how much control we’re prepared to give to the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22–23). Unrestrained “passionate desire,” as stated in Galatians 5:19, originates in the physical being rather than the spiritual one. Therefore, if one professes to be a follower of Christ, one must exercise self-control in sexual matters and maintain an ethical way of life. When doing this, we offer our physical selves as a sacrifice to God (1 Corinthians 6:18–20).
We know that God’s rebukes and instructions show His affection for us. Following his instructions during our stay on earth will bring nothing but good. By maintaining sexual purity before marriage, we protect ourselves from developing emotional attachments that might damage future partnerships. Only God’s love is stronger than our love for our spouses. We can protect that love by not having sexual relations outside the marriage bed (Hebrews 13:4).
You used to walk in the shadows, but now that you’re in the Lord, you should walk in the light (since the light’s fruit is goodness, righteousness, and truth) and figure out what the Lord values most. Philippians 5: 7-10
As “children of light,” we are obligated to stand out from the crowd by how we conduct ourselves. When it comes to sexual virginity, however, the typical American Christian does not vary from the typical non-Christian. For instance, most of us would intellectually agree that having sexual relations outside marriage is undesirable, but our actions speak differently. Too often, we settle for average sexual behaviors, like living with our partners, having casual sex, or watching porn regularly.
Although we may sincerely intend to do what is right in God’s eyes, we often become caught up in sinful routines. We say we believe in God, act in ways that match our fallen nature and then ask God for forgiveness before starting the process over again. Many have wondered whether it’s ever possible to be sexually pure. How can we stop sexual immorality from perpetuating itself?
Protecting one’s sexual integrity requires planning. Here are some ways to formulate a strategy:
Find your faith. There’s a difference between trusting something and being sure about it. You hold this notion because you think it’s true. But if you’re certain about something, you’ll take action. Even if you say you agree that having sexual relations with someone outside of marriage is wrong, you may not be doing what you preach. To counter this, a person with a strong will can say, “I don’t care what other people think of me. Regardless of the circumstances, I will always follow the teachings of the Bible.”
Regarding the repercussions, delaying gratification because of fear may be a reasonable and healthy response. Think about the physical harm, broken relationships, crushed emotions, and severed connection with God that may result from sexual immorality.
Predetermine your options.
Purity of sexual conduct requires mature decision-making. Making a decision on sexual purity in the middle of a fight is doomed to failure. Watching a movie with a special someone. It would be best if you decided in advance:
Can you see yourself going out with a potential partner?
Is there a limit beyond which you will not go?
To what sorts of films, online articles, and television shows do you plan to devote your time?
Do your part; accept responsibility. Don’t be afraid to rally the people around you to help you stay true to God. We need to have somebody we can trust and open up to. People like this exist, and they are the ones who have succeeded despite facing challenges similar to their own. Suppose you desire a relationship connection with the opposite sex but have trouble being sexually pure. In that case, I suggest you take a few moments right now to make a conviction before the Lord.
Chastity in sexual relations might be difficult to maintain, but it’s well worth the effort. True love, not just sexual pleasure, is your reward. Hallelujah!